Wedding toasts are a way to call
everyone’s attention to the joy and love
that has brought everyone together in celebration.
Toasts give people a
chance to publicly express their feelings and honor
the bride and groom
with their kind words of advice, sentimental memories,
and best wishes for
the future.
Who should give a toast at the
reception?
Traditionally, the best man gives the first toast.
Other members of the
bridal party can join in with a toast of their own,
with the maid of honor
being next in line, if she so chooses. The groom may
toast his bride and
then thank his parents and his new in-laws as well
as his guests. The bride or groom's parents may also
like to get in on the action by congratulating the
newlyweds and thanking their friends and families for
coming, and so on. All toasts except the best man's
toast are strictly optional.
Is it appropriate to
ask people to make a toast?
If
you would like the best man or others to make a toast
at the reception, tell them up front and early on to
give them time to prepare their speech. Don't assume
that he or she knows that this is expected!
Remember giving a toast is optional,
so if someone is absolutely
adamant about not speaking at the reception, don't
push the issue. Find another special person that is
more
comfortable with public speaking to do the toasting.
When should the toasts be given?
Toasts are given anytime after the guests have been
seated, or have found
their seats after moving through the buffet line. Toasting
can also take
place at the end of cocktail hour, to signify the start
of the reception. Make sure you tell everyone giving
toasts exactly when you want them to start, to eliminate
any confusion at the
reception.
What is the etiquette for giving
a toast?
When making a toast, the
person should stand up, tap on their glass to get
the crowd's attention by saying something like "I
have a few words to say… or
Ladies and gentlemen..." However,
at most wedding receptions the DJ or
emcee formally announces the person when it is time
to give the toast.
Everyone should raise their glasses and drink after
each toast is made.
The bride and groom do not stand or drink when being
toasted.
How long should a wedding toast
last?
Keep the toast short and sweet.
A toast should be no more than 5 to 10
minutes long, but just a minute or two is sufficient.
A short, concise speech will be much more meaningful
and
memorable than one that drags on and on.
Here are some do's and don'ts
for giving a great wedding toast...
Do write
out the entire toast and practice speaking in front
of a few people or the mirror. Make a few notes to
refer
to
during the toast if you are
extremely
nervous and feeling
forgetful.
Don't read the
entire speech off of a paper. Try to memorize as much
as you can and deliver the toast as naturally as possible.
It is not important that you remember every word or
speak without making mistakes, just relax and try to
have fun and it will be great!
Do use
personal stories or humor in the speech to make it
more meaningful.
Don't bring up any past
relationships, marriages, or overly embarrassing
stories, etc. This is
not the time to air any dirty laundry. (Also make
sure that the content of the speech is appropriate
for all ages)
Do talk
about your friendship with the bride/groom. You could
tell a short story about how you met or share one
of your favorite memories of the time spent together.
Talk about what you have meant
to each other throughout the years and what it means
to be supporting your friend on this very important
day.
Do reflect
on the history of the happy couple. Tell a memorable
story of how they met or how they got engaged. Talk
about how the relationship has affected the both
of them positively.
Don't be
afraid of showing emotion. Let your guard down
and openly express your feelings even it seems
sappy. This is one of your
closest friends, if not your best friend, it is okay
to cry.
Do end
on a serious and sentimental note. Express your
hope that the couple has a happy, successful and
loving marriage and that you can't wait to see what
the future
holds for the newlyweds as they build their lives
together!
Overall the real key to writing
and delivering a great speech is truly caring about
the subject. If
you genuinely care about the couple this will come
across in your speech! So open your heart and your
soul, and
let the words flow!
Here’s
to love, laughter and a happily every after!
